


Hell Is Empty (All The Devils Are Here)

by Wix



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Civil War Team Iron Man, M/M, One-Sided Relationship, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), not team Cap friendly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-10
Packaged: 2019-06-24 03:54:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15621972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wix/pseuds/Wix
Summary: In the end, our choices always catch up with us.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! All my love and a new story for you to enjoy!
> 
> Author's Notes:  
> Hmm. None really for this chapter. The only thing that might be confusing is that the first section is in Tony's POV and then the rest is in Steve's.  
> That's it. I'll try to keep everyone updated on any major events in the other chapters author's notes.

In the end, it’s not the cold that does him in.

It’s the **_rage_**.

+++

Wakanda is a beautiful country. It’s astounding that no one outside knows of its true existence and power. Despite all of that though, and despite T’Challa’s friendly welcome – Steve wishes he were home. He wishes that he was waking up on his bed in the Compound, surrounded by his entire family. He wishes that he could walk down the hallway and see Rhodes and Sam trolling each other, that he could see Vision and Wanda slowly learning how to name the feeling that has grown between them. That he could spar with Nat while hearing the soft echoes of whatever ‘Classic Rock’ soundtrack Tony was playing down in his labs.

He wishes things could just go back to normal.

_‘Did you know? Don’t lie to me Rogers did you know?’ – ‘So was I’_

Steve closes his eyes and pushes away the memories of hurt and betrayed dark eyes looking at him as if _pleading_ with him to make all of this go away. To make none of it true.

And Steve hadn’t been able to do that. Instead Steve had been caught up in the moment, when he should have been the one outside of it.

Instead of helping anything, Steve just made it worse.

_‘You don’t deserve that shield’_

It’s a goodbye. A solid goodbye from Tony not just of the man, but also of the symbol. There’s no love left between them. Steve knew that when he dropped it. He knew that when he walked away.

Now he wishes he hadn’t. What if he had just placed himself in-between Bucky and Tony? What if he had tried to find a way to end the situation without a fight? What if he hadn’t walked away? What if he had stayed? What if he had taken Tony with them?

What was worse? That he’d abused Tony’s trust daily when he had it or how easily he abandoned him when the time came?

 _The Avengers are your family, maybe even more so than mine_.

It’s not the first time he regrets the letter. Thinking back on it at the time it made sense and was everything that Steve was feeling in trying to make Tony see his point of view. To make him realize why Steve had done what he did and why it wasn’t personal.

But it was.

Deeply personal, and now Steve can see that all that letter ended up being was a slap in the brunet’s face.

The Avengers were his family? Why did Steve write that? Why did he rub it in Tony’s face that the ‘so called family’ was now mostly with Steve? Had abandoned his side to go to Steve’s side in the midst of battle?

How was Tony ever supposed to trust them again if they even got to come back? Natasha was supposed to have his back and she left him hanging. Steve was supposed to be his friend and he lied and laid his hands on him. Sam always turned to Steve first and to Tony as a last resort and Wanda was still harboring rage from a time long since passed in Tony’s history.

Then Clint came and joined Steve. He hadn’t even asked _why_. He heard he was standing against Tony and he was on board. He never even tried to figure out Tony’s side or asked for clarification.

Were they ever Tony’s family? Were they ever even Tony’s _friends_?

“You should come inside.” Natasha says, holding open the door to the balcony and Steve sighs.

“I just need-”

“A moment. Yeah, I know. It’s what you always say.” She cuts him off with a kind yet exasperated tone to her voice. “But you’ll want to come inside.”

“Why?”

“Because Tony’s making an appearance and I’ve got it up on the television.” She tells him and he’s pushing off from the balcony before he’s even realized that he’s done it. Natasha seems to recognize the kneejerk reaction and there’s a kind of pity in her eyes. “Come on. You don’t want to miss it.” Steve follows her inside and he sees the others sitting around on the couches. Clint moves his legs off the couch to allow Nat and Steve to take a seat and they both do, settling in to see the first images of the billionaire since the split.

“What the?” Clint mutters when Tony finally steps up to the podium and Steve leans forward with the rest of them when they see the man of the hour. There’s a general silence through the reporters as well and he smiles that smirk that he always does whenever he knows he’s in control.

 _“Hello, did you miss me?”_ Tony asks and there’s a general consensus of chaos after that. Steve understands – the image in front of them is…confusing. For pushing fifty something Tony had always looked good…but now there’s a youthfulness to his body and his face – the lines are gone and his smile seems sharper in contrast, no longer softened by laugh lines accumulated over the years.

 _“Mr. Stark? In regards to your…”_ A reporter starts to ask and Tony chuckles and nods.

 _“Yeah, noticed that did you? Sorry everyone. Not something that can be replicated again. Unfortunately someone got a little too liberal with the Extremis Virus usage.”_ Extremis, that virus that repaired cells and turned people into walking bombs.

“He healed himself with Extremis and what – decided to use it as a face lift as well?” Clint asks with a snort and Steve wants to tell him to be silent but he’s too focused on Tony to give the adequate level of attention to Clint to do so.

“How hurt was he that they had to use Extremis?” Sam asks, looking over at Steve and Steve just shrugs. He doesn’t know. Tony was hurt – that’s all he knows. Physically, spiritually…Steve hurt him. What else mattered?

Tony answers a few more questions, letting the world know that he was still Iron Man, that he was still on their side - he’s kind enough not to say ‘unlike Steve Rogers’ but the words are still clearly felt.

 _“How do you feel about King T’Challa playing mediator for your ex-teammates and offering them amnesty in Wakanda?”_ A reporter asks and Tony shrugs.

 _“I just hope that however it comes to pass that justice is served, and that those who were harmed during the actions taken by certain individuals are able to heal.”_ Tony says before Pepper comes onto the stage and Tony slides on a pair of sunglasses, blowing a kiss and a peace sign to the masses who are still shouting his name, trying to get one more question answered as the brunet walks off the stage.

There’s the sound of the door to their wing opening and T’Challa walks in almost like he heard his name and answered.

“Ah Avengers, good you’re all together. Come, we must speak.” T’Challa says and they all nod, Wanda reaching over almost too quickly to grab the remote and shut off the reporters who are still talking about Tony on the screen.

“Of course.” Steve says, turning his attention to the king as he gets up and the others follow him. He hopes that whatever the king has to say during this meeting that it’s good.

He could really use some good news today.

+++

_“You just need to be patient Captain.” T’Challa tells him. “These things can take some time.”_

Steve tries to remember that when he sees news report after news report of Tony Stark assisting with the damages caused by Steve, Bucky and T’Challa when they were dealing with the Task Force.

_“He’s just trying to make people forget that he’s just as much at fault as we are.” Wanda mutters when she sees him reading the most recent article._

Steve tries to remember that it takes time when he sees articles published praising Iron Man and his quick responses and open communication between law enforcement agencies. He tries to remember that it takes time when he reads about the charities and the auctions and the events meant to help those in need.

_“He’s running himself ragged.” Natasha says when she sees the latest numbers on the September Foundations charity auction. “He’s going to burn out.”_

_“You say that like it’s a bad thing.” Clint snorts and Sam elbows him hard in the ribs. “No seriously. If he’s distracted by that he’s less likely to be stewing inside his lab coming up with ways to make our lives more difficult.”_

_“We need to get back.” Steve says, and he pretends not to see the looks that the others give each other._

Steve tries to remember that he needs to take it slow when T’Challa finally enters with a smile on his face as he holds up their tickets _home_.

+++

The Compound is no longer the housing location of the Avengers Initiative.

Steve doesn’t know how he feels when T’Challa informs him of that. Tony apparently remodeled after the damage done to the structure from Wanda’s and Clint’s flight from Vision and during that time he made an agreement with the Accords Council to treat the Avengers Initiative more like an institution and less like a small group of privately funded strike team.

There are no more apartments within the structure, and their things have been placed into storage containers for them to go pay for and collect when they have the time.

There’s not much available for them when they come back. The agreements with the Avengers Initiative comes with a pay scale these days but it’s nothing that allows for things to be the way that they were. Luckily Sam still owns his house and they’re able to all crash there until they’re able to rent their own apartments around the city.

There’s no talking to Tony about it. The Iron Man pilot never seems to be available whenever they’re around and Steve knows that it’s intentional.

_“A huge fucking complex and he kicks us all out like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum.” Clint growls as he slides around Wanda and Nat in the kitchen and goes to sit over at the table. Things are tight these days and they always seem to be tripping over themselves, but Steve doesn’t feel like he minds as much as the other man does. Besides, what other options are there? It’s clear that Tony isn’t going to step in for them._

Steve tries to keep his head down as much as possible. He tries to ignore the looks he gets from the other people who now work at the Avengers Compound – tries to ignore the judgement in their eyes. He hears them whispering sometimes, the man who fancied himself a hero. The man who left Tony Stark to die after protecting the man who murdered his parents.

T’Challa might have gotten the courts to let them back – but it’s clear that no one has forgiven them.

+++

“I’ve got something that’s going to make your day.” Sam says, coming into the kitchen and Steve looks up. “Put a smile on your face.” He holds out a letter and Steve opens it.

It’s an invitation. To an Avengers Charity Ball.

“Guess we’re gonna have to rent a few monkey suits.” Clint mutters, leaning over his shoulder and reading the information on the page.

“Is Tony going to be there?” Steve finds himself asking and Sam nods.

“I don’t see why he wouldn’t be. It’s an Avengers Charity. He’s all about those isn’t he? It’s kind of his scene.” Sam replies and Wanda lets out a soft, annoyed huff.

“Why do you care so much?” She asks. “Stark’s making our lives miserable and you’re excited to see him again?”

“Tony’s not making our lives miserable Wanda.” Steve argues and Clint snorts.

“Eh, he kind of is Cap. Look around and weep – no offense Sam.” Clint says and Sam shrugs. “Stark’s been leading a one man crusade against us since we got back.”

“Because he sold the Compound?” Steve asks. “That makes no sense.”

“He only sold it because he knew that they’d do this with it. Don’t let those big brown eyes fool you Cap. Stark’s behind it and he knows very well what he’s done and what he’s doing. We had a working system before and now he’s just stomping his foot and being a baby because we didn’t bow down and kiss his feet as he walked by.”

“That’s not what happened Clint.” Steve says and Clint rolls his eyes.

“Steve, I love you man – but yeah it kind of is.” He claps his arm over Steve’s shoulders. “But who knows, maybe this is our blessing in disguise.” Clint says, snatching the letter from his hands. “All we need to do is gussy you up like Cinderella at the ball, throw you in Stark’s path and BAM! All our problems solved.”

“How on earth is that going to solve all our problems?” Steve asks and Clint snorts and pats Steve’s arm.

“All we have to do is remind Stark what he wants more than anything and it’ll all sort itself out.”

“I don’t get it.” Steve says and Natasha whacks Clint upside the head.

“Ignore this moron.” She tells him and Steve lets her guide him out of the room.

“Nat, what was all that about?” Steve asks and Natasha sighs with a roll of her eyes.

“Nothing, you know Clint’s going through a tough time. He’s just lashing out.” She says and Steve nods.

“Yeah…but that still doesn’t explain what he was talking about.” Steve presses and Natasha looks at him and she must see that he’s not going to drop this because she lets out a soft Russian curse before she looks at him.

“…He’s referring to the fact that Tony’s in love with you.” She says and it’s like the Red Skull just punched him in the gut.

“What? No he doesn’t.” Steve gets past tight vocal chords and she sighs.

“Yes he does. He has for a while. Why do you think he was always trying to impress you? Why he was always offering for the two of you to hang out? Why you and you alone had access to the lab regardless of time of day?”

“He just liked to show off.” Steve says and it sounds hollow as he thinks back at all of those soft smiles, that kind of nervous energy that Tony would exhibit as he would show Steve something new he’d just created for him. How Tony always seemed to know when he showed up and would turn to him whenever he came into the room, his attention immediately on Steve over anyone else. The way that Tony looked at him when he told him that his door was always open and that if Steve ever needed _anything_ , not to hesitate but just ask and Tony would provide. “No…he didn’t…”

“Steve…” Natasha cuts off. “It’s been there for a long time…almost as long as it has been for you.”

“What?” Steve says. “I don’t…I’m not…He’s not…” He can’t find the words and Natasha just smiles.

“Okay. Well we’ve got other things to worry about.” She says and Steve lets her ramble about places that they can afford to go to and favors that she has to get them something nice.

“He doesn’t.” Steve finally manages to say after a while and he tries not to acknowledge how he hasn’t listened to a word she’s said. “After what I did to him…even if he did, he wouldn’t anymore.”

“Oh Steve.” Natasha says with a shake of her head. “It’s like you don’t know Tony at all. He’s not good at recognizing things that are bad for him and not running for them full throttle.”

“…are you saying I’d be bad for him?”

“I’m just saying that I doubt there’s anything that you could do that he wouldn’t forgive you for if you asked, even if it would be in his best interest not to do that.” She looks him in the eye. “If he forgave you tomorrow, would you do it again?”

“No.” Steve says quickly.

“Would you hurt him intentionally?”

“Never.”

“Then you’re already better for him than everyone else he’s been with before.” She says and Steve almost wants to weep at the low bar that’s setting. Tony deserves better than that, he always has. “So let’s doll you up and see where the chips fall okay?” He pauses to consider it before he nods.

“Okay.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for all the reviews! I noticed a few asking about the pairing. I don't have an answer for you at this time and I probably won't have an answer until something happens in the story that reveals it. Sorry. 
> 
> Authors Notes: Warnings for this Chapter -  
> ...wow. Tony's angry.

The whole event is brightly lit and filled to the absolute brim with well-dressed people draped in glittering diamonds and jewels. It’s a lot more money than Steve is still used to seeing at one event and it still makes him uncomfortable to be not only amongst the crowd, but picked out from it and idolized for some silly reason or another.

But it’s all for a good reason, so he’s told. The Avengers Charity Gala is bound to support so many people who need help and assistance in various ways and Steve slightly wishes that he’d taken the time to read a brochure or whatever pamphlet has gotten people here to give money to one of these causes. He usually does better…doesn’t he? He seems to recall being pretty good at this once upon a time. Bonds sales were skyrocketing if he remembers correctly and any charity event that the Avengers hosted before always went off like a rocket. Numbers and checks rolling in before the night was through.

Steve wonders if that had anything to do with him and the other Avengers and not Tony who always seemed so worn and ragged the days leading up to an event before shining like the sun the night of.

“Having fun Cap?” Clint asks and Steve nods slightly, looking around the room. “He’s not here yet.” Clint says with a roll of his eyes and Steve glances at him. “It’s still early, he likes to make an entrance remember?”

“He’s usually here by now though. ‘Make an entrance but don’t leave people waiting on you or they get annoyed and defensive and are less likely to listen when you need them to’.” Steve quotes and Clint looks at Steve like he’s surprised by some neat little trick he’s done. “What? That’s what he told me once.”

“Natasha says he’s rushing over from some SI meeting.” Clint informs him. “It’s already in the itinerary that he’s going to be a little late.” Clint motions to Steve. “That’s why we’re here. To hold down the fort till they get a glimpse of the one they really want.”

“I’m sure it’s not like that.” Steve tries to argue but it falls flat and the look Clint gives him tells him that Clint thinks it does too.

“Money likes money. These people don’t give a damn about the little guys or whatever their money’s going to. As long as they get to preen and puff up each other’s egos, they’ll smile and pretend that everything is right in the world.” Clint snorts after he says that and takes a sip of champagne. “Assholes. They just want to see one of them ‘being a hero’. That’s all they’re paying for.”

“As long as their checks don’t bounce, I’m cool with that.” Sam says, coming over and grabbing another drink off a tray. “That and as long as the open bar stays open and free.” Steve sighs and looks around the room. Natasha has interjected herself into a group of people who are laughing and chatting with the red-head and Steve doesn’t doubt that she’s doing her part to schmooze and get the donations that they need. Wanda, however, is off in a corner, tugging at the seams of her dress’s sleeves and Steve feels a little bad about the wide berth that people seem intent on giving her.

Steve inclines to Clint and Sam before he slowly makes his way through the crowd and comes over to where she’s backed herself up against the wall.

“Hey, everything alright?” Steve asks and she looks at him.

“They’re all afraid of me.” She says, motioning towards the crowd. “They don’t want me here.”

“I’m sure not everyone thinks that.” Steve tries to assure her and she shakes her head.

“They’re all afraid of me Steve. I don’t like…I don’t want to cause a scene.” She says, her eyes glancing around the room and Steve wonders what little snippets of thoughts she’s picking up. Steve goes to say something about how getting out there and showing them there’s nothing to fear would be a good first step instead of playing the angry wallflower but he’s halted when almost all the attention in the room seems to drift over to the grand staircase.

An entrance Clint said.

Well it was certainly one heck of an entrance.

Tony stands at the top of the stairs, glancing down at all of them like a king looking down at his subjects before a friendly, almost sensual smile spreads across his face and he waves while starting down the stairs to join them. The suit he’s wearing is perfectly tailored, and it moves with him with every step he takes and Steve can’t seem to help the mental thanks that he sends whoever Tony got to make that ensemble for him.

“The devil’s arrived.” Wanda mutters and Steve shakes his head.

“He’s not the devil Wanda.” Steve says but he doesn’t look at her when he says it. He doesn’t take his eyes off the brunet who immediately slides into the first group standing at the bottom of the stairs, reaching out and shaking hands.

“Senator Kinsley, we’re so glad you could make it.” He can hear Tony say before he looks at the woman next to the ‘senator’. “Valerie, you’re looking radiant as ever.”

“We were starting to wonder if you were going to make it, Tony.” ‘Valerie’ states as the two of them lean forward and kiss each other’s cheeks. Steve doesn’t miss how ‘Valerie’ lingers a little longer than necessary for the greeting as Tony just smiles and waves it off.

“You know how meetings are.” He says like he’s sharing some deep secret with them and they nod and laugh with him.

“Aren’t you going to say hi?” Wanda asks and she sounds upset for some reason. “Isn’t that what this whole night was about?” Steve nods, sparing her a quick goodbye smile before he makes his way across the area to where Tony is.

He’s a little surprised at how the smile doesn’t change when Tony sees him. It’s the easiest way to know something’s wrong. Tony’s smiles always changed whenever Steve used to approach him. They’d turn friendly or exasperated or secretive like something funny was happening that only Steve and Tony were in on, but there’s no such secret in the twist of Tony’s lips this time around.

“Ah Steve, Senator have you had the great pleasure of meeting my good friend Steve Rogers?” Tony asks and Steve isn’t sure how to react when Tony just reaches over and puts a gentle hand on his arm guiding him over and into the conversation.

“No, I don’t think we have.” Kinsley says as he offers his hand to shake and Steve nods with a smile he’s barely able to keep up as he accepts it. It’s almost near impossible not to want to turn to glance at the brunet who is standing beside him. It feels like torture a little bit, to have Tony there, so close and yet not be able to communicate with him or talk to him freely.

Steve wonders if that’s intentional on the billionaire’s part.

Tony for the most part doesn’t act like he sees any problem with pretending like everything is fine between them. He’s all smiles, witty jokes and easy touches that drive Steve insane as he bites the inside of his cheek to ask Tony what his game is.

“Smile Captain.” Tony leans up and whispers into his ear. “Won’t do to have them think you’re not enjoying their company.” Tony chastises and Steve can’t help but get a whiff of whatever cologne Tony is wearing tonight.

It undoubtedly costs an arm and a leg because he smells _fantastic._

Steve lets Tony guide him around, pretending as best as he can that he’s not climbing up the walls with the need to stop this whole sham and just _talk_ to Tony when he sees his chance. Tony looks legitimately surprised and confused when Steve reaches out to take his hand and pulls him towards the dance floor that they were passing.

Like his previous behavior for the whole night, Tony lets Steve pull him close without even the slightest hesitation on his part.

“I don’t really know how to do this.” Steve admits and Tony’s smile is still off somehow. It’s not cruel and it’s not mocking – it’s just…hollow.

“Don’t worry, it’s really just shuffling back and forth these days. I sincerely doubt anyone will mark off any points for poor form.”

“I could always let you lead.” Steve offers and Tony lets out a soft little chuckle and _that one_ sounds slightly mocking.

“We both know that’s never going to happen, don’t we Captain?” Tony asks and Steve cringes a little.

“Tony I’m-”

“Now, now. Don’t ruin the night with false platitudes.” Tony cuts him off. “I’d rather we not waste time with you lying to me. There’s been more than enough of that going around wouldn’t you say?” Steve flinches at that. “It would just be in poor taste.” Tony slides in closer and moves with his slightly unsure steps, somehow making the whole thing feel a lot more graceful than anything Steve could have managed on his own. “Now, look over my left shoulder. Festive American pocket square – see him?” Steve glances over Tony’s shoulder and notices the man instantly.

“I see him.”

“Die hard Captain America fan. I’m even told his trading card collection would have made Coulson weep.” Tony tells him. “When we’re finished up here with convincing the masses that there’s no enmity between us, you should go over there and make small talk. It should be easy enough, you’re very good at pretending to care for someone whose money you want.”

“Tony…” Steve starts to say but nothing comes. What is he supposed to say to that? I’m sorry? I’m sorry doesn’t cut it and it doesn’t change the very real truth that it’s exactly what Steve did. He lied and he pretended so that Tony would be left in the dark. So that he could have his cake and eat it too as Clint would say. “…everything’s okay now? With you I mean? The Extremis I mean. I know how dangerous you said it was.”

“Things are as they are.” Tony replies. “I’ll admit I’m surprised that Natasha let you come first. I would have guessed she would have tried to soften the sell before they threw you at me looking like this.”

“The night is young.” Steve says. “Nat might still try to talk to you, and there’s nothing to ‘sell’.” Tony looks up at him with an amused look.

“Of course not Captain. My apologies. I misread the situation. It happens sometimes, especially when the lot of you are involved.”

“You didn’t misread the situation.” Steve tells him. “It just…it all just got out of hand Tony. I know…I know I should have told you but…do you ever have that moment where you don’t tell a secret and then each day that passes feels like it gets harder and harder to tell?”

“No actually.” Tony replies. “I don’t know the first thing about something like that. This wasn’t some little ‘I ate the last brownie’ sort of secret. Or I put the dent in the car and someone else got blamed and grounded for it levels of secret. This was world shattering, rewriting history levels of secret. Worse, it wasn’t your secret to withhold. It was mine and it was Barnes’s.”

“I’m sorry Tony.” Steve says and Tony sighs like Steve’s just disappointed him. “I should have told you.”

“Ah, but you were protecting me. Or were you protecting yourself? That whole letter was all over the place, my dear. You’ll have to forgive me when I say that I didn’t understand a word of it.”

“I shouldn’t have sent that letter.” Steve says and Tony shakes his head.

“On that we disagree. I think that sending that letter was the most honest thing you’ve done in a while.”

“What?”

“It let me know _exactly_ what you thought. It let me know what you thought of me, of how you will rewrite your own history to make yourself sound like a much more sympathetic individual in your own narrative, and it showed me where you stood.” Tony shakes his head again. “No, I rather appreciated it. It was ten kinds of absurd, and rather entertaining to read in an insulting sort of way – but it was you. Right there, on the page, finally crystal clear to me.” Steve cringes again at those words and he doesn’t fight them. There’s a moment of just awkward silence between them before he feels Tony tense in his arms, all that languid smoothness gone and it makes Steve look at him questioningly only to see him glancing behind him at something.

“What’s wrong?” Steve asks, and he can just feel the lie smooth over Tony’s face and body.

“Absolutely nothing, just saw a face I wasn’t expecting to see here.” Tony replies.

“In a bad kind of way?” Steve asks and Tony pulls away.

“Thank you for the dance, my dear.” Tony says and Steve realizes that the music has ended. “Don’t forget pocket square over there.” He says as a final refrain before he leaves him standing on the dance floor alone and Steve sighs.

“Pocket square. Right.” He mutters to himself as he starts over there.

He figures he can do at least one thing right tonight.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, hey guys.  
> So - this story took a sudden detour from where it was supposed to go and as such turned into a much shorter story than I had anticipated. But there was a thought that pressed upon my mind with this story after I finished the last chapter and I decided to let it go a different way and end on the note it ends on instead of turning it into a longer work.  
> I hope you enjoy it, and thanks for reading!

The party eventually ends, and not a moment too soon. In fact, if Steve had been able to have his way the party would have ended the moment that Tony walked away from him on the dance floor. It certainly wouldn’t have dragged on for another three hours of misery and the feeling of selling himself for scraps that third parties would be willing to part with. As it stands, Steve feels that he spends far too long regaling some man he doesn’t know who knows far too much random knowledge about Steve’s life before the ice in order to get a simple agreement for a donation and Steve feels _cheap_ when he walks away.

Like he has a price tag attached to him.

God, how does Tony do this so easily? How did he always do it before without complaint? Steve’s ready to rip his hair out after only one ‘sell’ and there are dozens more that they’re supposed to get before the night is over.

Steve doesn’t want to get them though. He just wants to go back to Sam’s place and take a long, hot shower and wipe away these feelings from his skin and his soul.

Steve’s grateful when Happy returns to take them home after the party ends. Steve was almost wondering if they’d be responsible for finding their own transportation now that the cameras aren’t on them but it seems that Tony’s playing it safe and making sure that they leave in just as much style as they arrived in.

Happy opens the door for them when they approach and Steve slides in with a mumbled thanks as he almost sinks into the leather seats. He feels drained as the car slides into traffic and starts the journey home, like he’s just undergone a STRIKE mission with Nat and they’re finally on their way back to base for rest and rejuvenation.

“So I take it your talk with Stark didn’t go well?” Sam asks and Steve sighs, reaching up and tugging at his bowtie, loosening it and tugging it off.

“No…No I wouldn’t say it did.” Steve admits softly. “He wasn’t very…I don’t think that bridge is something that we’re going to be able to mend anytime soon…if ever.”

“Don’t be so fatalistic Cap.” Clint tells him. “It was a first meeting. Stark needs to feel like he has the last word and that everyone is feeling his displeasure. It’ll pass.” Steve doesn’t say anything to that, but he can’t help but watch as the window to the front slowly starts to roll up, cutting them off from the driver and cutting Happy off from anything they’re saying about his boss.

 _His friend Steve. Happy’s not like you guys, he’s actually Tony’s friend._ Steve can’t help the thought that runs through his mind as Natasha shakes her head.

“Actually, I’m not sure.” She says and they all look at her. “He was…strangely detached when I talked to him.”

“What did he say to you?” Clint asks and Nat tilts her head a little as if in thought.

“Nothing much. He evaded all attempts to talk frankly, turning everything around into proper targets on the floor for me to go work my magic on. He even ran interference whenever I got stuck with someone for too long after getting the okay.”

“He did that for me too.” Sam admits. “I mean, not a lot of people wanted to talk to me – rude – but the two who did just keep droning on and on and he came and got me out of there.”

“That sounds like a good thing.” Steve says and Nat shakes her head.

“It’s not. Far from it.”

“What do you mean?” Sam asks.

“If he were angry and just wanted us to suffer until he felt we’d learned our lesson like Clint thinks – he would have left us to the wolves, but he didn’t. He was professional. He was concise and he was untouchable.” Steve feels like he knows exactly what Natasha’s saying. He held Tony in his arms, talked with him and saw briefly past that mask but even then it felt like he was just grasping at straws. Seeing what he wanted to see perhaps in the brunet’s eyes.

No…No he knows what he saw.

He’d almost label it hate if it wasn’t so tied into the pain that Steve’s caused Tony over the years.

“Untouchable.” Steve finds himself muttering as he looks out the window. “That sounds about right.”

+++

The conference room is empty when they walk in and Steve’s not sure for a moment if he’s gotten the wrong time for the meeting. If it weren’t for the others behind him agreeing that it’s supposed to be now, Steve would worry that he had.

 ** _‘Please take a seat. Colonel Rhodes will be with you momentarily.’_** FRIDAY tells them and they all grab chairs around the room. Sure enough, a few minutes later Rhodes wheels himself into the room and Steve feels like someone has just punched him in the chest.

Rhodes’ is paralyzed. That’s right. That was a price that Tony’s side had to pay because Steve hadn’t taken the time to just listen and come up with a plan that included all of them. Sam looks equal parts gutted and guilty when he sees Rhodes and the man just wheels himself to the head of the table and locks the wheels.

“Shall we begin?” Rhodes asks and Steve looks around behind him at the door for Tony to walk in.

“Shouldn’t we wait for Tony?” He asks and Rhodes shakes his head.

“No need.” He responds. “As of last night, Mr. Stark has retired from the Avengers Initiative and has worked out a private contract with the Accords for any instances that might require Iron Man to step up and return to the field.”

“What!” Slips out of Steve’s mouth before he can think about it and the others seem to agree with him.

“Tony’s stepping down?” Natasha asks and Rhodes nods.

“He’s seriously going to pull that ‘I’m taking all my toys home with me and you can’t play with them’ bullshit?” Clint snaps and Rhodes ignores the archer much to Clint’s growing irritation.

“Mr. Stark has decided to look at different avenues by which he can be useful to the world and has decided to take a step back from the Avengers.”

“You mean a giant leap.” Clint mutters.

“Without Iron Man on the field, we’ll be at a severe disadvantage.” Natasha warns. “Tony knows that, he knows that the world needs him to get past whatever it is that might be tripping him up and stand his ground.” Rhodes snorts softly like Natasha’s just said something funny and he can’t help himself but he quickly smothers it away.

“Mr. Stark will be joining a secondary team as it were, still overseen by the Council and in constant communication with them, but he will not be returning to this group.”

“We need a heavy hitter.” Steve says softly. “Iron Man is the best.”

“Yes he is.” Rhodes agrees easily. “However, you’ll have myself and Vision to join you in approved missions.”

“You’re paralyzed.” Clint points out. “You can’t pilot the suit.”

“I can and I will.” Rhodes tells him. “But thank you for pointing out the obvious with such tact. Very well done.” It feels like a verbal slap and Clint glowers a bit but falls silent.

“This other team? Who is on it?” Nat asks and Rhodes shrugs.

“That would be the members of the Accords with doctorates who do not wish to be on the field on a day to day basis.”

“Bruce is back?” Nat asks, reading between the lines and Rhodes nods.

“Dr. Banner has returned, yes.”

“He’s signed the Accords?”

“Evidently, since he’s here and part of the Avengers Initiative.”

“Tony doesn’t have to leave.” Steve says. “If he wants to be in the lab with Bruce he can do that while still being Iron Man, I mean he did it before.”

“Yes he did, but he’s determined not to place himself in that position again.” Rhodes replies. “Now, should we talk about upcoming missions and events?” He starts and Steve tunes him out slightly as he deals with the bombshell that’s just been dropped on them.

Tony’s leaving.

He’s leaving because of Steve and Steve doesn’t know how to make him stay.

…Steve would give anything to make him stay.

+++

Tony’s moving things around the lab, shuffling around the bots and poking at them good naturedly like they were real people getting in his way. Steve smiles a little at the picture and he wonders if he ever appreciated it before as much as he does right now.

“I’m surprised I still have access to the labs.” Steve says softly after a moment and Tony doesn’t sigh, he doesn’t tense or look at Steve with irritation in his eyes – instead he just presses on with packing up.

“Well, very soon everyone will have equal access down here.” Tony tells him. “It’ll be an empty box. Maybe the Council will use it for storage? A safe place to keep extra medical supplies or back up weapons.”

“Tony…can we talk?”

“Is that an honest question where you’ll abide my response or is that code for you’re going to press on regardless of what I say?” Tony puts the box in his hands down on the platform and wipes his hands off on his pants.

“…I don’t know.” Steve answers. “I think there’s a lot of...things that we need to talk about? Things that even if we don’t want to we probably should do it anyways?”

“So the second answer, good to know. Carry on.” Tony says, waving him on and continuing with his packing. “Unfortunately I don’t have a lot of time to waste. You have exactly as long as it takes me to finish up here.”

“Rhodes says you’re leaving the Avengers.” Steve says and Tony’s face gets a momentarily confused look.

“Why would he say that? Unless of course you didn’t listen to what he was actually saying and that’s what you took from the conversation – but no. I’m not leaving the Avengers Initiative. I’m placing Iron Man on backup standby and I’m helping Reed and Bruce – I’m sorry, Dr. Richards and Dr. Banner – come up with potential backup plans for any other armies waiting up in space to come down and wipe us out.”

“You could stay though…and you’re choosing to leave.”

“You mean I’m choosing to leave the lot of you.” Tony says. “And you’d be right. There’s enough targets on my back without having to worry about two-faced ‘friends’ who just can’t help themselves from stabbing me anytime I turn my back to them.” Tony gives him an almost friendly look. “I’m sure you understand. It’s just common sense.”

“We wouldn’t stab you in the back Tony.” Steve argues. “Things are…they’re different. We’re different.”

“How so?” Tony asks, offering Dum-E – or is that Butterfingers? Before offering one of the bots a box and letting them run off with it.

“Things were tough Tony…things were done that we’re not proud of…but we’re recognizing that. We’re trying to change….We’re going to be better.”

“I hope that’s true.” Tony replies to him easily. “I certainly hope that’s true. The world deserves the heroes that it was promised, not a group of entitled children stomping around with far too much firepower and a constant belief that they should be held to a different standard than everyone else.”

“That’s not what we think.” Steve argues and Tony smiles. It’s the smile from last night.

“I certainly hope so.” Tony says. “It would be sad to find out that after everything, none of you had learned their lessons. Granted I think you’re lying – either to me or to yourself, or possibly both, but that’s not my concern anymore.”

“Tony…Tony please…just…” Steve doesn’t know what he wants to say, and he kind of hates how Tony stops what he’s doing to look at him with dark, expectant eyes.

“Just what Steve?” Tony prompts when nothing comes out of him for a few moments.

“You don’t have to leave.”

“I know.” Tony tells him. “But I want to, and therefore I’m going to. It’s as simple as that.”

“Nothing about this is simple.” Steve fires back at him and Tony’s smile turns amused.

“I think that’s probably the truest statement you’ve said in a while.” Tony says and Steve’s not sure if he’s mocking him. “At least you’re aware of that much.”

“Things could be different – can be different – _will_ be different.”

“Which one is it? Each of those options have the ability to give completely different end results.”

“Tony please.”

“Please what Steve? You haven’t actually told me what you want?”

“Yes I have! I’ve told you! I’ve been telling you!” Steve snaps and Tony sighs and leans casually against the table.

“No, you’ve given half thought responses to a problem that you haven’t yet come out and said what it is. I’m leaving, that seems to distress you for some reason. I’ll admit that I cannot fully fathom why, you were always so keen to be rid of me before.”

“No I wasn’t Tony.”

“Really? Strange, I must have misread all those times you never called me. Like during the SHIELD catastrophe, or when the papers declared me dead, or when I wanted to come along with your little ‘find Bucky Barnes’ mission, but I guess I understand now why you wanted me as far away as possible from that one. Guilt is a hard thing to deal with, doubly so if you’re forced to look at your lies and the person you’re betraying day in and day out. It must be so much easier to just have them put funds in your account and keep the lights on back home.”

“Tony…”

“Steve.”

“It’ll be different.” Steve promises. “…I’ll…I’ll be different. It’ll be different between us.” Tony makes a small face, and he sighs again.

“And now we’re coming to the actual crux of the problem.” Tony looks him in the eyes. “I’m assuming that at this point Natasha or Clint – maybe even Sam because it wasn’t that secretive – have told you my little secret.” Steve wants to shake his head.

“They said some things. I told them they were wrong.”

“Ah, but we both know that’s not true. Don’t we Captain?” Tony replies and Steve’s breath catches in his throat. “So let’s deal with the elephant in the room, so to speak, and then let’s go our separate ways.” Tony looks at him. “I was in love with you. I know that Natasha must have hoped that some form of my lingering weakness for you would have carried over or she would not have blown as much of her ‘secret funds’ on that tux last night for you.” Tony gives him an almost lazy smile. “Although I must admit, you wore it well.”

“You…you looked nice too.” Steve offers up and Tony shrugs.

“I always do, it’s my blessing and my curse.” Tony says and it sounds like he could be patting himself on the back but there’s something slightly true in those words. “But last night was a test. Throwing you out like a worm on a hook seeing if they’d reel in a fish.” Tony smirks. “Sorry, Captain. I’m not biting anymore. Once burned, twice shy and all that.”

“I didn’t know.” Steve says, inwardly bucking back against those final words. “I didn’t know Tony.”

“I know. It was obvious.” Tony says with a nod. “You were possibly the _only_ one who didn’t know, but it is what it is.”

“We could…I mean…I’ve…I’ve changed Tony. I understand and I see things differently now. Things will be different.”

“I hope you have.” Tony says. “I honestly hope you have changed and that you’ve seen how lying to someone who was your friend is a dick thing to do. I hope you don’t do it again. I hope I’m the last heart broken by the great Captain America.”

“I didn’t mean to break your heart Tony. I’d do anything to take it back…if you’d just…if you’d just give me a chance I’ll be better, I’ll do better. I know that I was wrong, I see it. I see it all the time and I want to fix it.”

“No.” Tony says, and his voice is firm. “No, you don’t get that. I said that I hope you grow from this, but I need you to realize something – what you did to me, what you put me through? It was not some stepping stone you had to deal with to allow you to open your eyes and realize that there are consequences for how you treat others. Sure, _perhaps_ you’ve realized your mistakes and _perhaps_ you recognize your hand in the wreckage that lays around us – but that doesn’t fix anything.”

“Tony-”

“No, shut up.” Tony tells him and his jaw almost audibly clicks shut. “You don’t get to have a ‘chance’ with me now that you’ve – quote on quote – changed. I’m not some kind of nonentity that is required to give you a shot because of all the hard work you might have done or are willing to go forth and do. You turning a new leaf – regardless if you have or not – does not invalidate all of the bullshit that I had to put up with and experience until you figured out you needed to do it. This door? This door between us is closed. Sealed. Shut. Forever.”

“Tony…”

“Now, I’m going to finish packing up, and you’re going to go upstairs and I hope that you try to be the promise that we were given when all of us bought into the Captain America stories. But you and me? There will never be anything you can do to repair what’s happened between us.”

“Why not?” Steve asks – pleads almost and Tony tilts his head.

“I could try to explain it, but I honestly don’t think it’d get through to you. So the simple answer is this. Because I said so. Because I have chosen to draw that line and no one gets to tell me I don’t have the right or the ability to do that. Because I’ve chosen to step back – for me and for no one else regardless of the stories you’ll tell yourselves when I’m gone, and I’m not coming back. I don’t have to.” A bot comes over and taps Tony’s leg and Tony looks away from him to glance down at it. “Everything finished?” There’s a beep to his question. “Good. It seems our time is up Captain. I wish you all the best.” Tony says as he walks over to the loading dock and hits a few buttons, locking it up and climbing on it with the bot. “Goodbye Steve Rogers.” Tony tells him before the giant elevator takes him up and out of sight.

“Goodbye Tony.” Steve whispers to the empty room when he’s gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Parting Notes:  
> So like I said, this one detoured and went somewhere completely unexpected so I'll undoubtedly revisit this plot bunny in another story. I won't give away any secrets about who the person was last chapter since it'll undoubtedly be used in another story.  
> I'll put it in the notes the connection when I write it so you guys know it's filling in for where this one was originally planned to go.  
> Thanks Everyone!

**Author's Note:**

> Please No Reviews Of A Critiquing/Negative or Argumentative Nature. Thank You.


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